吊

以上标题不表示我现在的心情。
最近都很忙，但最超吊的就是我一面咳着忙我的东西。
已经咳了差不多六天了，还是没什么好过这样。


有时真的很不明白为什么把有些人把自己的部落格放密码。
再有下次就不再做你们的狗仔队了，可以留些时间给我做别的事。
对！我就是八到连别的事都放在一边。超吊的哦！

什么是感觉？

我什么都办了
已经付出我所可以的
但万万都想不到
我输在爱情的
感觉

Ailing Mechanism

The head was heavy enough that may fall off. The top of the head is being crushed by a hammer each thought comes in mind. The sides of the skull are trying to reach one another torturing the brain to give way. The eyes are burning like fire in every blink. Looking up does not make the eyes feel better.

The throat is grinding for the moment and cough out as if the next thing will be the lung. The cough causes the impact to the brain spreading metal balls crushing each one another till the impact stops. The cough made the stomach to struggle as if every cough is a punch from a hammer with telephone book on the chest. The hands and legs are shivering cold although the head is otherwise. The movements are slower than usual. As if everything is on drug, but doesn’t taste as sweet as a drug.

This is how my body works when I’m sick.

The Life of Joseph

The end of 2010 is near and lots of homework I've learn throughout this year. Not many make me proud to know of and may take the person’s life as an example. Fortunately, I made myself to know few worthy brothers, who would do, understand and teach me things which opened my view on different things. The sad thing is, all of the brothers are attached and only me who are still labelled as the single man. lol

However, they didn’t let me down. Though they are all attached, they managed to spend time together with me, 4 of us doing random stuffs and chat craps. What I know of, will spend their time with another woman or disappear suddenly with her to another place. I too will make such mistakes, but atleast, I least make people to hate me.

What I learnt, is stating self as strong religious person and talk mostly about religion may result a backfire. People will look high on the person and believe that all believers are such passionate people. What was the true purpose a person to join in a new and different community? Is it to spread the words? To meet new people? Or to fill-up the empty parts of own life where other places has rejected the person?

What was the true definition of love in the first place? If one is dare enough to lecture me about love with the facts right, I will lay down myself and listen. If one has the good example of him/herself to prove that sharing the same goal is what true love is, then I will listen. If one is only talk cock and shows a lot of passionate-bullshit-bro-this-bro-that, makes me sick why should I even bother listen.

It’s near Christmas and I’m sick. I just hope that sense and rational works in everyone’s head. I was awake when everyone is leaving this house. But I chose to sleep. To sleep off the masked faces and remain what was left for me in this house. I do cherish the life here. At least I place a stone here so that others will remember me, Jeremy Yong, made others happy and smile.

Aberrant Inclemency Night

Nowadays the weather seems to be having mood-swings.

Today I'm shivering begging for another warmth.

While tomorrow I may prefer alone in a Arabian Desert day.

Now I'm sick and having severe flu. 

Hopefully no one pisses me off in my weak condition.

As I have poor emotion management when I'm sick.

Last year's today, I demand for a change to spread love instead of crave.

Now to look back what I've done so far.

I've done nothing.

Facebook banned in Malaysia?

KANGAR, Dec 6 — Umno Supreme Council member Datuk Seri Dr Shahidan Kassim today called for the blocking of the Facebook social networking website if its contents continue to pose a threat to national security. (themalaysianinsider.com)

Is it true? Find it yourself. 

I found myself can't even load a page of facebook today at 5:30AM, 17/12/2010. 

While other pages like google, blogger, and etc. are working well and fast.

I guess the government 1, malaysian 0 for this round.

Appears that two Middle-East countries already banned facebook!
Syria, Pakistan and Iran (rumored China and Vietnam but I need confirmation)
And both Muslim country, so Malaysia IS POSSIBLE to be another loving country to ban facebook.

FML

FYI, 10 minutes later facebook is back online. lol

Nerf wars in office!

 Yes! In year 2008, Nerf wars has been popular even in the office!

HAHAHAHA...

Brotherhood

The code name is 'Bros before holes'. I have regretted to choose to hear a woman’s words over my brother’s invitation. Choose to spend time with a woman than with my brothers. And now I have missed a lot of those times that I could have used to do crazy and meaningful things with my brothers.

The word “brother” is the ones that I don’t have to list him as a good friend with a paper or he comes over and says I’m his brother. It just happened over the times we spent over different storms at the sea. Gives me advice not by words but action, motivates me not by asking but the influence over time. Don’t need to say “well done” when done a good job. The most important thing is 'know-what-to-do-at-the-right-time'. That is my definition of Brotherhood.

Since 2008

Shooting stars!

Starry Night Over the Rhone
Vincent van Gogh

Sadly, I don't have a good camera to take down beautiful dark sky with shooting stars.

Went to friend's house and try out his new dish.

Fruits dip-in candle-like chocolate!

Though I don't know what they call it.

But it is something like chocolate fountain.

Then later that.

Found out that there's shooting stars!

It's a pretty random thing and we end up looking at the stars the whole night.

In the end I didn't read my notes at all.

FML

Nerf guns for kids? Nah...

Went to Tesco today and saw some cool guns for sale. 

Well, technically they're toys, the Nerf Guns.

Kids play THESE?!

At first I thought, what the heck? 

This must be a joke!

But I'm so DAMN WRONG about it.

It seems that it has been quite popular outside Malaysia. 

Tournaments that works like Paint Ball games but CHEAPER.

Look at the kids playing with "guns"

Should I get one?

Hmm...

Irwansyah and Acha Septriasa - My Heart

Though this song does not represent my feelings or anything near that, 

I still love it even I play it million times with other of my emo songs.

How to Get a Girlfriend

I was browsing randomly and God knows how my head sparks the idea of searching 

"How to Get a Girlfriend". 

Surprisingly, Google gives me a list of websites and I found this the most useful one. 

They even provide a video about it lolwtf.

  

1. Talk to as many women as possible, not just girls you're immediately attracted to. This gives you good practice in talking to women (especially if you have any anxiety about that) and learning about how girls feel and think, in general. Make it a goal to talk to at least 5 new women a day (in person, any woman, any age, any appearance, any personality). 
2. Something you should consider is letting her know you are single. Wearing a "single bracelet" will do the trick and they are stylish. There are nice ones at various online retailers. 
3. Don't use “canned material”, “nuclear attraction” routines, or other social robotics. The best way to make a connection with someone is to come from the heart and live fully in the moment. What you say isn’t nearly as important as how you say it. Socializing is about exchanging energy, not being a wordsmith. When in doubt, just say “Hi”.
4. Put yourself out there. You don't have to hit the bars or the clubs if that's not your scene, but you have to do something that exposes you to new people. Pursue interests and activities that mean a lot to you. The Internet has made this a whole lot easier. Check forums, listings, classifieds, and listservs for local events or meetings that are likely to attract people with similar interests or passions. You can also explore new interests or activities--you might find a new passion and a girlfriend in one fell swoop! 
5. Keep an open mind. If you're looking for a girlfriend (that is, someone who will be in a committed relationship with you) you should be more willing to overlook initial shyness and awkwardness so that you can get to know a person over more than one date. Your future girlfriend might be someone who you initially didn't see as "girlfriend material" but as you spend more time with her, you discover more things you like about her and you suddenly find yourself romantically interested. 
6. Practice genuinely complimenting girls. Challenge yourself to find something beautiful in any girl. It doesn't have to be something physical; it can be a cute gesture, an admirable trait, a talent or skill. Recognizing and expressing true appreciation for any and every girl will make you more attracted to girls and girls more attracted to you.  
7. Flirt. A big part of being charming is knowing how to flirt, and the people who are best at flirting are people who are always in a playful and laid back state of mind. It's the opposite of being serious, nervous, or uptight. 
8. Become a good conversationalist. Don't babble on and on about your mother, your cat, or your collection of bugs. A good conversationalist keeps finding things they have in common, and they do it in a casual, non-intrusive way. For example, there's a difference between asking someone "Have you ever held a tarantula?" and saying "Have you ever felt the tiny hairs of a tarantula's legs brush up against the palm of your hand?" The latter is more poetic, but way too intimate for a first conversation for most people.
9. Close the deal. If you like the woman you're talking to, be the one who ends the conversation. This prevents the conversation from lingering into an awkward silence, shows that you're busy (i.e. not needy or desperate), and allows you to end the conversation on a positive note. When you end the conversation, simply say "Hey, I've gotta go, but it's been really good talking to you. Want to continue this over a cup of coffee sometime?" If she says yes, get her phone number and move on. If she says no, just move on. That's all there is to it.
10. When you go on dates with girls, break the touch barrier. If you're terrified of touching someone the wrong way, to the extent that you hesitate and never touch them first, your intentions are good and all, but your "touch paralysis" isn't helping you at all in the romantic department. Take a few little "touch risks". Be playful. Don't just always wait for them to do it first. If they don't like it, they'll definitely let you know. But touching someone communicates to them that you find them attractive, and also that you're reasonably confident. Both of these things can make someone feel more attracted to you.
11. Make her laugh. Girls love guys who have a good sense of humor, and the key to having a good sense of humor is to be lighthearted, and unabashedly yourself. As long as you're not making fun of people in a mean-spirited way, anything goes. Is your sense of humor perverted? Slapstick? Sarcastic? Go with it, and don't worry about whether or not she thinks you're funny because you know what? If she can't laugh with you, then this isn't a girl you want to spend a lot of time with anyway. And who knows? Maybe another girl—one whom you hadn't noticed before—will be laughing so hard that her soda comes out of her nose, and maybe you've just found your soulmate.
12. Help someone. It could be her, or it could be someone else in the room. Is she carrying something heavy? Say "let me help you with that" and carry it for her. Is someone short on cash? Lend them a few dollars so they can eat lunch. Hold the door open for the next person coming through, even if they haven't reached it yet. In other words, be a kind and generous person. Not only will it get her attention, but it will also make you feel good about yourself. Don't be fake and do nice things only when she's around, though. Help people all the time, in a wide variety of ways. She'll notice, and so will the people she knows, and on the occasion that you come up in a conversation, people will say "He's such a great person!" and this girl will start thinking "Yeah...he is, isn't he?"
13. If you find yourself getting lots of girl friends but no girlfriend, avoid the friend zone. The key here is to stop investing time and energy into girls who don't want to be your girlfriend. That may sound cold, but the fact is that you're "tying up" your feelings by maintaining a close friendship with someone who you have feelings for, but who isn't romantically interested in you. It'll be difficult to develop feelings for someone else if your feelings for this person are fueled every time you hang out. Even if you do manage to develop feelings for someone else, your heart might always be torn and confused, and it'll be hard to give your new flame your undivided affection. Sometimes the best thing to do is to take a "friend zone" friendship down to the level of acquaintance so you can focus more on dating.
14. If you find that girls are interested in you and then pull away, stop being needy. You might be scaring women off with your eagerness (which can come off as desperation). Slow down, and avoid the temptation to idealize every girl you like. If you find yourself using or even thinking the word "perfect" then you're probably putting her on a pedestal. Fill your life with so many activities that you're too busy to become infatuated with any one girl.
15. Be patient. Life doesn't normally work on the schedule you envision. Your future girlfriend might cross your path tomorrow or two years from now. A healthy relationship will color your world no matter how old you are, so don't rush into things, or else you might end up forcing the wrong person into the girlfriend role, which will cause pain for everyone involved. 

From: How to Get a Girlfriend

Missed the badass me

After days passed by

I realized I don’t find myself to be flirting with many individuals in a time

Instead

I spent my time on one individual that I aimed for commitment and life-time goal

This is kind of sad and depressing when being rejected 

or 

being played as a fool for months only realized she is not the one.

I find it hard to actually even follow the rules of hooking up a girl

Perhaps I’m tired of the procedure every man has to do in order to gain a woman’s interest. 

Instead, I’ve been ‘too friendly’ to individuals who are in relationships. 

Which, leads me nowhere.

 

My weakness, 

not able to multi-relationship at a time 

and not able to be good friend with single woman.

Sheila On 7 - Berhenti Berharap

Aku tak percaya lagi
Dengan apa yang kau beri
Aku terdampar disini
Tersudut menunggu mati
Aku tak percaya lagi
Akan guna matahari
Yang dulu mampu terangi
Sudut gelap hati ini


Aku berhenti berharap
Dan menunggu datang gelap
Sampe nanti suatu saat
Tak ada cinta kudapat
Kenapa ada derita
Bila bahagia tercipta
Kenapa ada sang hitam
Bila putih menyenangkan


Reff :
Aku pulang…
Tanpa dendam….
Ku terima… kekalahanku…
Aku pulang…
Tanpa dendam…
Kusalut kan .. kemenanganmu…

Kau ajarkan aku bahagia
Kau ajarkan aku derita
Kau tunjukkan aku bahagia
Kau tunjukkan aku derita
Kau berikan aku bahagia
Kau berikan aku derita..


Aku pulang….
Tanpa dendam….
Ku terima… kekalahanku…


Rebahkan kalbumu
Lepaskan perlahan
Kau akan mengerti
Semua..
Aku berhenti berharap
Dan menunggu datang gelap
Sampai nanti suatu saat
Tak ada cinta kudapat..

Dying Humanity

Probably a lot of facebookers have known this: A young man, 22, suicide over a 4 months relationship.

Alviss Kong 22 Year Old Malaysian Committed Suicide

I got this news when my friend was online using his facebook account (fyi, I temporary deactivate my account). A man, same age as me from KL killed himself and even left the last words and countdown in his facebook profile.

What is the ugly part of the whole thing when I was looking at his profile?

How people have look at life like a restart button in our computer. Some liked his status. Some took him like he is joking. Seriously, if the whole conversation coverts into a real life setting will these so-called friends reacted the way like how they commented on his profile?

Facebook destroyed the humanity in everyone’s heart.

Things I want to shout out, to the people who admired this young man’s courage:

1. This is a coward’s act; in fact, running away like throwing your life will not solve the problem.
2. You make bigger problems to your family, especially the ones that loved you and raised you up.
3. One’s action is like a newspaper; such act will not be remembered forever, because it is not inspiring at all. Unless you kill the president or make an army revoke the government.

To the facebookers and currently addicted to it:

1. Without facebook, life sucks. I know, because I am experiencing it now.
2. Think back, when was the last you talked to person who have recently went missing, had an accident and sleeping at the hospital, or the ones past away.
3. Look at the life now, and imagine 10 or maybe 50 years later. What will we be doing? Working? Retired and enjoy life? Counting the days to die? Or perhaps something that helps contribute the younger generations, which will not lead them to do like what we have mistakenly done?

Maybe I’ve been lecturing myself, keep on reminding these things in my head. 

But it is difficult. It’s never easy. 

The results though, will not lead me to complain and end my life easily.